Hello fellow Wanderers! Since half of everything in Washington is still shut down I have decided to write something a little different. It’s been a struggle to really feel inspired to write lately. I know I’m not alone with the many millions who are experiencing the same lack of inspiration, even a bit of sadness.
I believe the root of our problems isn’t actually the pandemic itself, but what it’s taken from us; our sense of security and our income. This leads to panic questions we have no real answers for. Will I find work again? How will I pay for this or that? When will everything go back to normal? It really made me think…
When did my entire existence become solely about cash flow? What the hell happened to my dreams? When did my life turn into living only paycheck to paycheck and barely scraping up enough money for food after the bills? Why is this considered ‘normal’? Because I allowed it. I let myself get sucked into the game of Life but recently discovered I’m actually playing Monopoly and I don’t own a single damn hotel.
So now I know the truth… my truth… I don’t want to go back to normal. I wasn’t really happy back in normal. I have to change, but how?
First, I had to figure out what I want to be when I grow up. Since we all need some form of money (no matter how much I’ve grown to hate it, it’s true) we have to have an income. Maybe not a lot if we’re thrifty, but we still need a smidge for some basic stuff… like food, I love eating food, so there’s that. I’ve decided that we absolutely should at least like, if not love, what we do for that money. Happiness is more important than dollars and that must be taken into consideration when picking what you wanna be when you grow up. Child you, will appreciate it.
To figure out what I should be, I decided to make a list. Sounds silly right? Nope. It lays it all out there. I made a list of things I hate, like and love. I discovered my true self when I did this 7 years ago. I found out then, I had to be an author. It was just a simple list. But it pointed out the true me. It was like finding myself. So, I did it again. I wrote another list (stuff can change in 7 years!) and I learned that I should stick with writing yes, but there’s more… I should work with animals. I should be outdoors. I should be around art, music and history. I should grow things and design things. I should be creative and work with my hands.
I am an author, who should have a farm of her own with a big art studio somewhere on the property and I really just want a simple life. I actually want to work for myself. I want to do landscape design, open a coffee cart, work in a museum or zoo. I want to grow as much of my own food as I can. Care for animals who need a home and a good meal. I want to watch the sunset without the background noise of traffic and sirens. I want to bring life to blank pages and boring yards…
So if you’re wondering what you wanna be when you grow up… find out. Write it out. Make a love, like, hate list and put anything on it. Think of different jobs you’ve had, hobbies, even seasons or foods. There are no wrong answers. Then research things you can do that include some things from the like/love list. When you’re doing this you’ll see, all of a sudden there you are, hidden under the constant survival mode of a life that is paycheck to paycheck. You just need to meet yourself and then you can follow the things that will bring you joy and some income. Don’t be afraid, child you was fearless.
Until next time, keep them boots wandering and seek out your truth.